I was listening to Emily P. Freeman’s The Next Right Thing podcast the other day, and at the very end of the episode, she posed some thoughtful questions to ask yourself at the end of the year. One in particular stuck out to me.

She asked, “Are there any decisions you made at the beginning of the year that you are now reaping the benefits of?”

How would you answer that question?

Without even skipping a beat, right there in my car, I spoke out an emphatic, “Yes!”

That was the best feeling. Here, my end-of-year self could say out loud and without hesitation that YES, all those scary-seeming decisions I made back in January, the ones that seemed so bold that I shouldn’t even write them down, have been giving me life and set me on the path I wanted to be on but wasn’t sure how to get to.

The rhythm of my life this year has looked very different than that of years past. From 2014-2018, I maintained an unusual work schedule (and thereby an unusual life schedule) that focused heavily on busy, money-making weekends. As the years and that business progressed, not only were my weekends blocked off for work, but most of my weekdays were too.

That’s not to say I didn’t love my work or have a genuine passion for it. I just let it grow too crazy, like a garden overgrown with weeds. The life got choked out, the soil couldn’t get sun, and there were a lot of tiny shoots that wanted to grow and flourish but couldn’t. I made the scary decision to make a drastic change, and I’m so glad I did.

Are there any parts in your life that look or feel like that? What changes could you implement this year that might feel scary, but ultimately worth it? Write them down!

2019 looked and felt so different. I still have that business, but only allow myself a few clients a month, and only on weekdays. Making that boundary gave me the freedom to say yes to starting a new business - writing - as well as to pour into making music, a love I’ve had since I was little.

Having what I call "Sacred Weekends” has been the sweetest gift to me. I have been able to spend time with John, doing home projects, sitting on the couch, and making great food. I have been able to say yes to birthday parties and weekend trips that felt life-giving instead of too-quick blips between work.

In August, after five years of trying to grow our family, I took a pregnancy test and it was positive. And it didn’t go away, which was a giant fear from past experience with miscarriage. Jesus showed up and told me I didn’t have to be afraid. Today, I’m 22 weeks pregnant and I feel so much joy and excitement for what the future holds.

For all of those things, I am so grateful.

For a more detailed recap on the goings-on of 2019 for me and my little family, you can click here and here, too! My 2019 word was potential, and I can’t think of a more appropriate word for how everything worked out!

2020 Intentions

Guys, I feel so excited about 2020. Hopeful. Content. Peaceful. I can’t remember a recent turn-of-the-year that has felt quite this light.

How are you feeling about it?

I have a loving husband who is my best friend and makes me laugh all the time. I have a healthy, growing baby and trust for the future. I have lots of flexibility in my work schedule to be able to be home as needed, work that is a creative outlet and income stream.

I have a body that functions healthily, friends who encourage and uplift, and family that is close-by.

A roof over my head, a car to drive, food to feed my body.

Gratitude

When I take a moment to breathe and list out those gifts, I feel the glorious weight of gratitude, like a weighted blanket in winter, or the hot southern air in summer. Gratitude is something I want my 2020 to be filled to the brim with!

No matter how many times I’ve heard about its importance or power, gratitude is something I can always keep coming back to. It is a practice, much like working out. There are times when I feel in the zone and totally in shape and others in which a simple walk around a park is more than enough, leaving me breathing heavily.

When life gets confusing, scary, or just plain hard, gratitude is the river of God that always welcomes a refreshing dip. It steadies, grounds, and gives perspective. It is peaceful, adventurous, and invigorating. It’s not lying to yourself or seeing with rose-colored glasses, it is aligning yourself to Heaven’s truths instead of just the natural.

Where do you feel like you could apply more gratitude in your life this year?

Abundance

When I took a moment to sit down and think about a word for 2020, abundance kept coming up. I have a history of feeling lack and loss in my life, and it’s something the devil knows, so he totally tries to play that card. In the past, that has contributed to feelings of depression, discontent, and fear.

This year, I am speaking abundance over my home, my family, and my life! Friendships, finances, motherhood, business - there can be abundance in them all. I don’t have to fear good gifts because they could go away at any moment - no way! I can settle into the abundance, receive it, and enjoy it! That is something I want to proclaim and practice more in 2020.

Do you have any words that are sticking out to you for this year?

Mindfulness

Ok, I know this is a hot word right now, with many different connotations. When I say mindfulness, I mean something along the lines of regularly infusing slowness into each day, setting my awareness on the Holy Spirit, relaxing my whole body, and breathing.

Sometimes this can look like taking a walk, or breathing deeply with my eyes closed before bed while letting go of the cares of the day. Sometimes it looks like journaling, soaking worship, yoga, or prayer.

It is the act of bringing myself back from the past or the future into the present moment, where I can feel Jesus.

Do you have any mindfulness practices that you do regularly? Do you have any that you want to try more of this year?

Here are some practical goals I want to work on this coming year:

Invest into the order and peace of my home and family (including fun/travel)
Have more financial competency and control
Invest into myself through books and learning
Enjoy productivity through deep consistent work, creating for fun, physical health, mental/emotional health, and loving others intentionally
Do scary things that align with my heart and passions
Say yes to community
Walk out a life of spiritual growth and integrity

I’d love to read what your intentions, hopes, and goals are for this coming year! If you post these publicly, comment with a link below! Or just comment listing them out! I can’t wait to cheer you on!

Cheers to a fresh, new year filled with hope for you and me!

Sam

2019 Thoughts + 2020 Intentions